Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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