hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
