i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
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