I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
