haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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