Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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