Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
