I'll bet she douches with gravy.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
