Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
