love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
