He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
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