I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
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It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
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I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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