is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
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