dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
