You're a womanizer and a bitch.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
