You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
