she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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