How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
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I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
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Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
i out mim tonsoeep
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