hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
You did what with his pubic hair?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
