i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
