is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
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