Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
