Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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