Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
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