worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Randomize
