oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize