Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize