He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I have fence marks all over my body
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
