i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
