So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I have aggressive nipples.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
