I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
then he tried to convert me to islam
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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