And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
