before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
