Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
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