found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
