I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize