If that was your dad, he is hot
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
