Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
nutella sex= disaster
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
