official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Randomize
