he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
