Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
