We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
