I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
