you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize