I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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