Texts From Last Night

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  (706): View more from Georgia

  so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess

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  (706): so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess http://tfl.nu/py20
  Replies (88) Good night (759) Bad night (5450)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  so you made the shocked face and they caught you.

  (571): View more from Virginia

  yup.

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  (571): i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise. (570): so you made the shocked face and they caught you. (571): yup. http://tfl.nu/1dzq
  Replies (19) Good night (1415) Bad night (5279)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?

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  (330): this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants? http://tfl.nu/rwj9
  Replies (12) Good night (6059) Bad night (956)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.

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  (704): This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'. http://tfl.nu/12fd
  Replies (9) Good night (760) Bad night (2342)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress

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  (302): I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress http://tfl.nu/yb5l
  Replies (16) Good night (5599) Bad night (1018)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.

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  (775): You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes. http://tfl.nu/wxud
  Replies (22) Good night (1208) Bad night (5003)
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  (347): View more from New York

  full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb

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  (347): full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb http://tfl.nu/b13u
  Replies (1) Good night (1909) Bad night (634)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.

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  (+61): She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING. http://tfl.nu/6o0j
  Replies (17) Good night (1041) Bad night (1985)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"

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  (604): He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked" http://tfl.nu/v4rb
  Replies (6) Good night (1485) Bad night (586)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?

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  (505): Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke? http://tfl.nu/u3od
  Replies (3) Good night (849) Bad night (987)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table

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  (254): Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table http://tfl.nu/xk9z
  Replies (4) Good night (1405) Bad night (444)
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  (+49): View more from Germany

  I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka

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  (+49): I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka http://tfl.nu/jrp7
  Replies (4) Good night (1670) Bad night (793)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera

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  (410): I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera http://tfl.nu/vxvj
  Replies (4) Good night (1046) Bad night (474)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.

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  (425): You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you. http://tfl.nu/vxkn
  Replies (8) Good night (859) Bad night (346)
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.

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  (580): I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman. http://tfl.nu/gkff
  Replies (3) Good night (457) Bad night (227)

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