my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
