I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
