I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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