Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
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I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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