I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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