There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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