he wants to bone in the snuggie
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Randomize
