that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
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