How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Sex with a fat chick.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
29 Super Simple DIY Drinking Games
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!