dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
3 2 1 whiskey
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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